About Kimberley

Kimberley Clayton Blaine, MA, MFT, is the executive producer of the Go-To Mom series and the producer of the branded entertainment show www.MommytoMommy.TV. She is the author of The Internet Mommy & The Go-To Mom’s Parents’ Guide to Emotion Coaching Young Children. In September 2011, Kimberley was named one of the most powerful moms in social media by Working Mother Magazine. Currently, she is a spokesperson for Lego Duplo, Disney Consumer Products, Schick Intuition, and Sony Electronics digital imaging. Kimberley is also a national parenting expert and a licensed Family and Child Therapist specializing in working with children newborn to seven years old. Connect with Kimberley Clayton Blaine on Google+

Riviera Maya Cancun is the Perfect Mexico Family Get-a-Way

The Karisma Hotels and Resorts are made for families. It’s very high end and all meals and unlimited cocktails/drinks are included, for which they call Gourmet Inclusive.  Visit Karisma’s site and to see ALL their hotels click on tab “hotels” for “everyone.”  However, the family properties we liked most were “Azul Resort” and “Generations Maroma” because we have kids under 11 – The have adorable Fisher-Price Family Suites for families with younger kids. The best part of the rooms are the SWIM UP SUITES – where your kids can open the patio door and jump right down in the pool! This place is just magical… The food is fresh as they have their own organic garden. My kids ate home made yogurt each morning and I had fresh wheat grass juice each day. It was such a nice experience. But be sure you bring water shoes, you never know if the rocks will float up to the swimming part of the resorts.

If you have kids over 12 you must stay at their resort called the Azul Sensatori – the teen program and amenities are mind blowing!  Karisma Hotels just opened a new hotel in Jamaica you should see as well… We will go back next June for sure when the prices are highly discounted.  WATCH  my VIDEO above to really get a feel of just how luxurious these resorts are…  Check out my PINTEREST CANCUN BOARD! I’m pretty sure you’ll book a trip the minute you see it!

The Go-To Mom team was given a complimentary stay at the resort. Kimberley Blaine only supports products and services that contribute to the overall well-being of families and children.

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My love affair with Big Sky Country – Montana

“I’m in love with Montana. For other states I have admiration, respect, recognition, even some affection. But with Montana it is love. And it’s difficult to analyze love when you’re in it.”  John Steinbeck

I had no idea where I was going. We landed in Missoula Montana and I was expecting to pull up to a flat, dry space with a few barns and cabins spread about. We had a gig to shoot a show at Paws Up Resort to feature their “Glamping” experience – which was spectacular – you can see my video we shot for a Sony. Little did I know that my life would change as we pulled out of the Podunk airport and up the glorious road to the ranch. For nearly 40 minutes I was speechless and couldn’t help but peer out the window with a true sense of awe. Was this place real? It was eerie. I was overcome with complete serenity and I forgot I was with my entire family in a car. As I looked at the vast land, cows, lakes, old burnt down structures, mountains, rolling grass hills, farms and literally empty roads I couldn’t help think I was a pawn in some type of game. Was this real? Was I born in cave coming for California? I’ve been to the mountains, Yosemite, Canada, Utah, Colorado you name a ski resort and I’ve been there! But this, this was beginning of a real love affair. The homes on mirror-imaged lakes where innocent, they screamed, “This is what living should be.” I kept insisting that this might be a movie set of some sort. But as we drove, the land was far too big to be so. I felt this yearning to live there. A sense of peace and that the world is really worth cherishing and preserving. Why is it that this state was a Zen-like infusion into my soul? I crave the Montana experience. I’m making an effort to go back once a year so I can get my serenity fix. We look forward to skiing the highest mountain peaks and fishing in the rivers during summer. As I boarded the plane home I grabbed a local parenting magazine based out of Missoula with an adorable baby on the cover.  As I thumbed through it I thought, wow, this place is progressive too – the writing was alternative, deep and addicting. Damn, I was impressed. The magazine was Mamalode.com and after reading every page from front to back, I knew I had an anchor there. As writer and advocate for all things amazing for families.

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Why joy should be your main priority

“Stop! There is no where to go and nothing to do, but there is everything to be.” –Michael Brown
The magnificent journey of life is solely yours – what would you like to make of it today?  It’s a known fact that positive people are less likely to get sick and are overall physically healthier than those who hold a negative view of life…  I keep hearing Esther Hicks voice in my head, “Your life and everyone else in the Universe is playing the part that you have assigned to them.  You can literally script any life that you desire, and the Universe will deliver to you the people, places, and events just as you decide them to be. For you are the creator of your own experience-you have only to decide it and allow it to be.”  Each day I wake I know I am responsible for my own peace of mind.  I am also responsible for setting up a life that teaches my kids how to see themselves as their own greatest resource.  It is my strongest hope that we all stop looking at outside sources for a sense of achievement or well-being.  We all hold within ourselves the power to be all that we wish.  Over the years I have learned from Esther that  “If we knew our potential to feel good, we would ask no one to be different so that we can feel good. We would free ourself of all of that cumbersome impossibility of needing to control the world, or control our mate, or control our children. We are the only one who creates our reality.  For no one else can think for you, no one else can do it. It is only you, every bit of it you.”  Check out the post “The Habits Of Supremely Happy People” – it’s a fun read.  And for daily inspiration please visit my favorite quote site, SimpleReminders.com.

More quotes that will lift your spirits and motivate your soul…

We either make ourselves happy or miserable. The amount of work is the same.  –Carlos Castaneda

Fear less, hope more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Hate less, love more; And all good things are yours. — Swedish proverb

We are not broken. Never have been and never will be. –Panache Desai

The most precious commodity on this planet right now is present moment awareness. –Michael Brown

Creativity is the greatest expression of liberty.  — Bryant McGill

Your job is simply to be, joyfully expressing your own inner worth and the universe will find a way to take of you.  –Marianne Williamson

Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them. — Count Leo Tolstoy

I’m not my past, a diagnosis nor product of my unfortunate upbringing. I am an emerging loving source here to prove life is worth living.  — Kimberley Blaine

When we are centered in joy, we attain our wisdom.  — Marianne Williamson

The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.  – Mark Twain

The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. –Allan K. Chalmers

I hope you will go out and let stories happen to you, and that you will work them, water them with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom. — Clarissa Pinkola Estés

I think happiness is what makes you pretty. Period. Happy people are beautiful. They become like a mirror and they reflect that happiness.   – Drew Barrymore

Learning to truly love yourself changes your relationship with everyone.  –Bryant McGill

While it does, and should, feel good to be appreciated by another person, if you are dependent upon their appreciation to feel good, you will not be able to consistently feel good, because no other person has the ability, or a responsibility, to hold you as their singular, positive object of attention. Your Inner Being, however, the Source within you, always holds you, with no exceptions, as a constant object of appreciation. So if you will tune your thoughts and actions to that consistent Vibration of Well-Being flowing forth from your Inner Being—you will thrive under any and all conditions.   ― Esther Hicks

If you’ve tasted happiness, I mean real joy, you’d never go back to anything else.  –Kimberley Blaine

 

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Pets and Groceries are consuming my time — How I mainstream my sanity with Post-it Products Evernote Collection

 The Go-To Mom Productions was compensated for the production of this episode/and or blog post by 3M/Post-it Brand. Kimberley Blaine will only promote, endorse and support companies she believes to have the highest standards in products and/or services that contribute to or enhance the well-being of families.

Getting your family organized can be an arduous process. When you add five pets in to the mix then it’s even more of a challenge. I have two busy kids and several furry creatures who keep me on my toes and who depend on me to keep their bellies full!  So you can imagine just how often I have to run to the store to keep the supply of food in stock. Since I’m a working mom running a company it’s quite the challenge to get all the errands run all by myself. My husband has been invaluable when it comes to getting things done around the house. He’s my Go-To Dad and is quite accustomed to the Post-it Notes process I’ve put in place. As you can see on the video I have basically organized the grocery and pet needs list on different colored Post-it Notes. Each day I clearly need to add more items to each list.

After a few days, when the lists are complete, someone has to go and pick up the items from different stores. All I do is snap a photo of the Post-it Notes with the Post-it Note Camera feature in Evernote and send it off to my husband. Snap, send and done. How cool is that?  On his way home from work, he has the completed list on his phone. He then keeps them in his family notebook in the Evernote app so we can share.

From shopping lists to pet care needs, Post-it Notes let you take what’s in your head and put it in front of you, making it impossible to forget for however long it remains in sight. No matter how long that is, it isn’t long enough. If it is worth writing down, it’s worth saving digitally because you never know if you’ll need it later. That’s why they’ve developed the Post-it Note Camera feature in Evernote that works with the Post-it Products Evernote Collection. With it, simply snap a photo of a Post-it Note. We then make the text searchable. Like everything in Evernote, your digital Post-it Notes are instantly available everywhere, so you’ll be able to find it easily. You can also search for Post-it Note since we auto-title these snapshots to include those words. It only takes a second, but this small new habit can have a tremendous impact.

Tip! Use the Post-it Note Holder Quad to keep uber organized!

If you want to do even more with your Post-it Notes, you can set different colors to be automatically organized in Evernote however you like. For example, make Electric Yellow your go-to for to-dos. Whenever you snap a photo of an Electric Yellow Post-it Note those images will automatically go into your To-Do Notebook. Do the same for other colors.

The Post-it Note Camera feature in Evernote is specially designed to enhance and transform your Post-it Notes into beautiful, digitally enhanced Post-it Notes saved in Evernote.

How to capture Post-it Notes using the Post-it Note Camera feature

Write clearly and legibly on a Post-it Note with any type of pen or ink. Then, go through the following steps to capture your Post-it Notes into Evernote:

  1. 1. Start the Evernote camera and swipe anywhere in the image capture area to select the Post-it Note feature.
  2. 2. Position the Post-it Note, including the edges, so that it is visible inside the frame
  3. 3. Tap the Snap icon to capture the Post-it Note. You can snap multiple notes one after the other and save it to the same Evernote note.
  4. 4. To preview the captured note(s) first, tap the Image Gallery icon. From here you can select particular pages to keep or discard. To discard a note, tap the Discard icon.

Get Yours Now – your pets will thank you for it! What other ways would you use the Post-it Products Evernote Collection?Buy Evernote Post-it Notes online or at your local office supply store. Get the Post-it Note Holder from the Evernote Market. The Post-it Note camera is available in Evernote for iPhone, iPad, Android, and Windows Phone. Learn more about the Post-it Brand Evernote Collection by visiting your local office supply store and by visiting Postit.com/Evernote , Post-it Brand on Twitter (@postitproducts ) or Facebook (http://facebook.com/postit ).

 

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JW Desert Ridge Resort is Perfect for Kids Who Love a Lazy River!

 We decided to enjoy an Arizona family vacation since my sister lives there. The JW Marriott Desert Ridge resort features acres of swimming pools, Lazy River with waterslide, whirlpools and poolside dining and a huge grassy lawn to kick balls or to chase the little ones around.  The surrounding beauty was quite shocking, as it was so plush and green, and not something typical for the desert.  The kids stayed in the lazy river pool for hours on end! It took me forever to convince them to come with me to swim in the big water feature pool! The frozen cocktails were delightful and perfect to cool down with in the mid day heat. When the sun went down, we enjoyed the live band down on the terrace as the kids played on the grassy knoll across from us.  I could relax and watch the kids from where I was situated. This hotel is designed for families and the rooms are very upscale, clean and refreshing.  That’s an important feature I look for when traveling with the kids.  If you have toddlers and preschoolers they have two other water areas that just shout, “We love kids!” If you’re interested in a desert vacation be sure to check out the JW Desert Ridge

The Go-To Mom team was given a complimentary stay at the resort. Kimberley Blaine only supports products and services that contribute to the overall well-being of families and children.

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Getting my act together — How I Keep up with the kids with Post-it Products Evernote Collection

 The Go-To Mom Productions was compensated for the production of this episode/an or blog post by 3M/Post-it Brand. Kimberley Blaine will only promote, endorse and support companies she believes to have the highest standards in products and/or services that contribute to or enhance the well-being of families.

It’s my family life that’s priority right now.  It’s important to me to ‘get it right’ and to feel good about all I do for my boys. Being organized means I’m a mom who cares. My boys both play baseball and are boy scouts. The duties I take on are never ending. One weekend the boys need to plan for their camp-outs, the next weekend we have to plan the snacks for the baseball team.  Planning is difficult and frustrating because my husband and I are never home at the same time. It’s super helpful to use the Post-it Products Evernote Collection when coordinating parental duties. We keep track of what needs to go to each game and camp out via Post-it Notes. Before a camping trip we compile a list of necessities. After a few days when the Post-it Note is complete we share it with dad via the Evernote app. In his spare time, the day before the trip he gathers the items from REI or Big Five sporting stores. I’m comfortable making the lists, but prefer for my husband to choose the camping gear for the boys. In the past my husband would have to always drive home first, pick up the Post-it Note and then run the family errands. With Evernote app it’s as easy as snap and send!

Now every one’s favorite Post-it Note is now Evernote’s new best friend. To keep our lives working like a well-oiled machine, we moms need to remember everything and work more effectively. It’s time to let your smart phone marry the Post-it Note. Have no fear! You’ll still be able to jot your notes down and organize your family’s world with all those pretty Post-it Notes. But now you can photograph all your colorful themed Post-it Notes and file them in the Evernote app and share them. So simple! You can see my Post-it Notes video here on their website [Link}

Here is how it works… Evernote has a dedicated Post-it Note Camera feature. With one tap, any Post-it Note is captured into Evernote, digitally enhanced and saved as a crisp, clear Evernote image. In the app Post-it Notes can be organized by color, have a reminder added or a due date assigned. Whether it’s a to-do list, a reminder, a sketch or a big idea, Evernote makes the Post-it Note searchable, providing users the flexibility of paper and efficiency of technology. The Evernote App is available for free from the App Store on iPhone, iPad and iPod touch or at www.appstore.com/evernote. For more information on the Post-it Brand Evernote Collection , visit Post-it.com/Evernote.

Get Yours Now

Buy Post-it Products Evernote Collection online or at your local office supply store. The Post-it Note camera is available in Evernote for iPhone, iPad, Android, and Windows Phone. How would the Post-it Products Evernote Collection help you and your family?

Learn more about the Post-it Brand Evernote Collection by visiting your local office supply store and by visiting Postit.com/Evernote , Post-it Brand on Twitter (@postitproducts ) and Facebook (http://facebook.com/postit ).

 

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A Luxurious Spa That Accommodates Moms @MontageBH

What mom doesn’t crave a day of beauty and wellness? When you go to the Spa Montage Beverly Hills you go for the experience — the smell, the decor, the warm down-pillow bed massage tables, the staff, the ambiance, all of it.  Moms can easily get overloaded with external distractions and every day commitments.   Yes, you can get a cheaper massage or spa treatment anywhere, but at the Spa Montage you can’t help but get in touch with the inner soul that deserves luxury, peace and a beautiful get-a-way for the day. What’s most impressive about all the Montage hotels (Deer Valley and Laguna Beach) is they have a great program called Paint Box Kids where you can drop off the kids and enjoy your personal time.  Check out some of the treatments that are available: seasonal renewal, magnesium ritual, body firming detox, wildcrafted organic facial and Beverly body bliss massage.  Book your time off and enjoy a day of indulgence at the Spa Montage.  I took my son mid-week on a day when he didn’t have camp and he enjoyed all the activities he did with Valerie the child care gal.  After my treatments and relaxing time alone I picked him up for lunch and we hung out at the cool roof-top pool.  After we ate he asked if he could spend the rest of the day with Valerie!  She was so sweet to him and he truly wanted to get more love and fun from the program!   You may want to consider a day to yourself… If you do, book it here… the Spa Montage is lovely.

 

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Tips For the Traveling Parent: Seven Ways to Stay Connected to Family

It’s no secret the traveling parent has a challenging time staying connected to loved ones when leaving home is part of his or her career.  Children may become accustomed to having a parent absent for long periods of time but that doesn’t mean that kids don’t miss their parent dearly.

Here are some fun and unique ways for families to bond and communicate when a parent travels.

Make a Travel Calendar
Dad can sit down with kids and draw a large diagram of where he will be going and what he will be doing.  Dad can sketch it and the kids can color it and hang it on the wall.  It’s fun for them to mark off the days until he returns.

Send Emails or Photos
How fun is it for a child to come home and know there may be a silly email or photo from Mommy?  Or better yet a movie embedded in the email.  With today’s technology you may want to consider investing in a computer with a built in video camera.  Children love to get video messages from their parent.  You can even bring one of their stuffed animals with you, wave it in front of the camera and give a report on how the animal is enjoying the trip.

Leave Gifts Behind
When my husband travels I get my son a little trinket or toy and put it on his nightstand for when he awakes.  He jumps up and knows it’s from daddy.  Some parents are against this type of indulging, however, my son carries the toy with him all day and tells everyone that his daddy left him a surprise because he is traveling.  The sweet love in my son’s eyes and the appreciation he shows is definitely worth the $4.99 that I pay for the item.

Make Mini Videos Before You Travel

The night before I leave for a business trip I make a few quick funny videos for the kids to watch while I am gone.  I do it on my computer and leave it for daddy to play back.  It takes five minutes for me to film and the kids truly look forward to seeing mommy on the computer talking when I am out of town.  You can even have a friend or your spouse video tape and play it back on the camera for the kids.

Schedule “Group” Good-Night Phone Calls

Call home ten minutes before the kids go to bed and have the family put the phone on speaker.  All can join the discussion and talk about their day.  You can even sing songs or tell jokes to make the night end on a light and happy note.  If you have a child under 2 ½ years old, you may not want to do this. Younger children may think you are home and will become distressed because they can’t see or be with you.

Prepare a Welcome Home Meal with A Theme
If mom is coming home from a business trip, dad can have the kids help shop and prepare a special themed dinner.  If you know mom loves bean and cheese burritos, you can have a festive Mexican meal ready. Nothing makes mom as happy as knowing her family is thinking of her and honoring her arrival with yummy foods.

Make Dad’s Favorite Snacks
Dad probably isn’t getting any of his favorite snacks or food when he travels.  Take the kids to to the store to help pick dad’s favorite snacks.  You can also bake his favorite cookies.  Dad will truly appreciate seeing his delicious turkey jerky and ginger cookies when he goes to grab something to eat.  Make sure the kids help out, so they feel they are a part of the loving effort!

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Social Media Moms Unplug in the Big Sky Country at Paws Up Ranch

There’s nothing more relaxing than relaxing in the river front taking in the beauty of Montana. I took my sidekick Beth, the founder of Techmamas.com, with me to film this episode for Sony. Little did we know that The Resort at Paws Up  would be the next biggest love of our lives. It was more than eye candy it was heart melting. We will never forget how joyful it was to watch our children roam the land with their walkie talkies, riding horses, shooting bow and arrows and having an unforgettable chuck wagon dinner.

We filmed on this beautiful property to feature the newest cyber-shot HX 20V. This particular pocket sized camera has a 40x zoom lens which blew away my camera man, because I was able to photograph an eagle’s face with this tiny little camera. It’s hard to believe that Beth an I who are two very techie mamas could unwind and unplug for any period of time. We did it and we are so appreciative that we were able to experience the luxury of The Resort at Paws Up and capturing our memories on the new Sony Cyber-shot HX 20V.

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The Fine Art of the Perfect Family Getaway in Soutern California – Montage Laguna Beach

Montage Laguna Beach is an ideal retreat for families. You get what you pay for – five star service and a luxurious experience. The hotel is not cheap, but if you’re a hotel junkie like me, you’ll stash your cash and come back for sure… My family LOVES the beach and most of our family trips are beach getaways…Besides sun, sand and sea, the Montage has a realm of fun family activities and programs, right at the resort. We never wanted to venture out!  A beautiful  tortoiseshell colored bunny rabbit was always hopping around the pool area…We named the bunny, “House.” They said it’s their house bunny, so the kids said, “Let’s name him HOUSE!” So I called him “Hugh Laury” instead.

When my hubby and I wanted some time alone, we had Paintbox and Paintbox Petite at our disposal. It’s an amazing exclusive children’s programs that celebrates the art of being a child. And boy do they LOVE children…Paintbox is specially designed for children ages 5 to 12 and 2 to 5 respectively, The kids were running around all day, keeping fit, doing crafts and constantly engaged by the sweetest staff. Stacey, one of the Paintbox leaders, greeted our kids at the pool while we were swimming. Now, if that’s not door to door hospitality, than what is? All the kids at the hotel were smiling and having a blast.

I could go on and on about our stay, but I made a video to show our true affinity for the resort. The dinner, lunch and breakfast were all 5-star cousine. The staff were on top of everything. I’ve never been to a hotel were they actually treated us like we lived there. Just looking at the home page www.MontageLagunaBeach.com is enough to make anyone go and visit. It’s serene, classy and luxurious. Their slogan is more than true..

“A hotel is where you visit, the Montage is where you live.” Wow. We’re thinking of an excuse to go back real soon!

This is a perfect getaway for the day too. Check out the “Moms Chilling for the Day” Video. You’ll be sold for sure…

The Go-To Mom Productions was given a complimentary stay. Kimberley Blaine will only promote, endorse and support companies she believes to have the highest standards in products and/or services that contribute to the well-being of families with young children.

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Bing Makes Shopping A Lot Easier. Why Moms Are Using Bing!

Ah ha! I love that everywhere I go I can see what my friends like! Once you sign into Facebook, do a search on Bing and it will show you what your Facebook friends like right by the product or service you’re looking at — so you receive personalized search results based on the opinions of your friends. Very cool!

Bing has made my life a lot easier! I make most of my decisions online, and now I never have to shop alone again! With Bing, I can build a shopping list and share, compare and discuss it with my Facebook friends. From finding the best prices, to getting reviews from your friends you know and trust, Bing has you covered!

This episode is sponsored in part by Microsoft Bing. The Go-To Mom Productions/Kimberley Blaine was compensated for this promotional video. Kimberley will only promote, endorse and support companies she believes to have the highest standards in products and/or services that contribute to the well-being of families with young children.

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The Mom’s Guide to Being More Present

While you surround yourself with those who support you be sure that you also support other women.  Mom power is contagious.

What does ‘being present’ really mean?  I’m not speaking about being happy just hanging out with your dog, kids or friends.  What I’m alluding to is a deeper meaning of sustaining an overall internal joy. Being a mom can be exhausting and lonely — but it doesn’t have to be that way all the time. In my mind I see being present as being connected to all things important to us and not allowing ourselves to live in the past or focus too much on our future. All we really only have is today, right? You can Manifest mindfulness as a mom and as a woman — you can manifest real and worthwhile moments each day if you fall in love with your gentle truthful soul…

When I’m taken out of the moment, I remind myself to recalibrate. Here are some ways you can start to increase your present moment awareness:

Admit that you’re perfect JUST the way you are…  define your own perfection and live by it – There is only one you in this world and they’re people out there who can’t wait to meet you. You don’t have to change to be a better person – you are uniquely you. If you have behaviors that are holding you back or get in the way of every day life, then focus on that specific task. Change behavior, not your being. Becoming more self-aware allows you to identify those behaviors that may be hampering your life. But overall, the world and your kids need you just the way you are. Fabulous.

Meditate, practice yoga or quiet yourself daily – Screaming, wheels rolling across the floor, screeching, banging, and “MOM!” is all I hear for a good portion of my day. If I’m not removing my toddler’s diaper because his brother filled it with mud then I’m usually peacekeeping sitting on the floor with both boys. When I’m not with the boys, my husband, or my friends, then I’m working multiple jobs.  So you see how I need to quiet myself daily to keep my sanity!

If you are a mom, none of what I just said surprises you.  Moms are great multi-taskers and usually have an inordinate amount of patience.  I have sensory issues so my patience often tested –  the slightest of loud noises can set me into a tailspin. It’s a hard task to ask of one self to make a change— — especially with the added demands of raising children and maintaining a career.  Meditation or quieting is one way that can help us attain calmness — The calmness that is needed to think, process, and integrate our world. 

Meditation can be as simple as telling yourself, that everything will be okay. Life will work out. The power of subliminal thinking is very powerful.  Some evenings when I feel too anxious to sleep I ask my husband to tell me that everything will be fine and that I will sleep well. He’ll say it exactly the way that I asked him to.  It works every time.

Debra Wesselmann in her book, The Whole Parent: How to Become a Terrific Parent Even if You Didn’t Have One, states, “As a parent, when your child ego state is triggered your inner child takes charge of parenting! The purpose of meditation is to help you keep your present-day adult self in charge as you parent.  This is accomplished by separating out the child part of your self from the adult part.”

Take time to do something fun – when we engage is things we consider fun we raise our serotonin and oxytocin levels – the chemicals in the brain that make us feel good. Be sure you’re getting a daily dose! Laughing, phone call with friend, hiking, walking pets, if it makes you feel joy – do it at least once a day. You deserve it. A replenished mom makes happy kids.

Stop rushing – worthwhile things come when you’re intentional and patient – As moms we automatically rush everything! We find ourselves saying, “Get in the car, put your shoes on, eat your dinner, get in the bath”  – the list goes on and on. We rush because we feel we’ll never get anything done if we take our time. Slow down. Take a breathe. And know everything will get done. I sound like your Grandmother don’t I? I notice when I slow down, I yell less and listen more. Try it. You may not get kids to bed at exactly the right time, but who cares if it’s 10 or 15 minutes later anyway? A calm mom is much more fun to be around.

Planting the seed with your kids for cooperation – Planting the seed means preparing ahead of time by helping your child understand what to expect in certain situations and what will be expected of him. When expectations are clearly laid out, children are far more likely to cooperate and less likely to be disruptive or difficult. Each morning I ask my boys how they’d like their day to go. Then I let them know how I’d like mine to lay out. I always ask for their help and cooperation, especially when I have a long workday away from home.Planting a seed lets them digest the message and sets them up for success.

Ask for help – it lightens the burden of every day life – Asking family and friends for help can be an awkward and difficult thing to do. In fact, many moms avoid asking for help and end up trying to do everything themselves. You may find that once you take the step and ask someone for help, it is much easier than you expected. Many times, family members and friends are willing, but just don’t know how to help. Whether you work out of home – or part/full time or you stay at home, parenting can be physically and emotionally taxing. How often do you feel comfortable asking for help?  Rarely, right?  This is an essential step to making your dreams come true. Ignoring your own needs can lead you to become physically and mentally exhausted, and neglect relationships with your friends and family. Worse yet, it will stop you from pursuing the things that you love to do.

Keep the lines of communication open with others – One of the main reasons we may get depressed or burnt out on motherhood is when hit hard times we begin to become resentful. Resentment will break up any good relationship so It’s imperative to never allow that feeling to creep up on you. Resentment comes from constantly feeling disrespected, or being mistreated or short-changed. If you voice your concerns appropriately the minute you feel them you can avoid resentment from festering – being open to all your emotions is key. You pass on your emotional intelligence to your kids.

Have set time each day when all electronics go OFF for the evening – All the cell phones are off in our family at dinnertime and stay off. No computers, iPads, DS’s. This is the optimal wind-down time for the soul. Right before we go to bed, we need to calm our senses and center ourselves for a good night’s sleep. Families engage more when no one is looking at a screen. Try it.  You’ll love the IRL love you get when the screens are dark!

Read or do something that inspires you before bedtime  - What ever you don’t process in your waking hours your mind will process during sleep. It’s important that you eliminate all stress, agitating imagery or bad energy before bedtime. Give your mind something wonderful to process so your subconscious can absorb and process the positive

Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, a guru of self-development, has great recommendations for you before you slumber!



·       As you lie in bed preparing for your nightly slumber, remember that the last thought you have in your mind can last up to four hours in your subconscious mind. That’s four hours of programming from just one moment of contemplation prior to going into your unconscious state. Create a reminder like a prayer or mantra to place by your bed. Write these words and read them as you get comfortable: I am going to use these moments to review what I intend to manifest into my life. Keep that sign there to remind you how to spend your pre-sleep moments nightly.



·       If before dropping off to sleep you are assailed by worry, distress, or fear, do not stay in bed. Get up, turn on the light, take a few deep breaths, read from a spiritual text, meditate for a few moments in front of a white candle, say a prayer—do anything other than staying there lying down. You cannot defend yourself against these onslaughts while remaining snug in your bed. If distressing feelings come back when you return to bed, get up, turn on the lights, and try something else. When you finally do feel peaceful back in bed, repeat your loving I ams and drift off to sleep ready to have your ears opened and your instructions sealed.

Leave Post-it Notes to yourself in areas you’ll see them with inspiring soul-boosting reminders – Don’t underestimate the power of subliminal messaging! Some believe once you write it down, then it comes true. I have a post note above my desk that says, “I am responsible for my own peace of mind.” Try it. It can be as simple as “I will forgive myself” or “Happiness and peace will run my day.” Get more inspirational messages at SimpleReminders.com

Never cancel or postpone a coffee date with a friend or trusted colleague.  Trust me, there is nothing more fruitful and empowering than two women sharing their time.  I also know that no other event or appointment would benefit you more than that coffee date.

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We were built for challenge and greatness. Reasons we must claim our happiness

“We are not broken… never have been and never will be.” Penache Desai

We are all born pure and innocent. How can we get back there and show the world what we’ve got?

It isn’t until about the sixth year of life children are expected to behave like little adults. At this time in our lives we realized we must stop our childish ways, buck up, be silenced and conform to adult norms. As we navigate our childhood into adulthood we lose the rawness of the self and shed the innocent nature of our soul. We harden each year we grow. We learn to be judgmental, insecure and self-conscious as we step into our adult armor. Knowing this today will better equip you to accept the child within that emerges in your present adult life. This inner child who hardens is often seen as our ego self… When we positively meet our inner-child’s needs and integrate past unsolved issues, we bring that innocent self back and feed the soul. When you starve or numb your inner child, you encourage your ego to go outside itself to find power. The ego will stop at nothing to win and take down others with little regret.  Our greatest feat as happy human beings is to get back in touch with the pure and loving self that we were born into. Loving and nurturing the real soul keeps the ego in check.

 

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Living with Early Childhood ADHD is like trying to wrangle & rehabilitate a wild horse

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” Plato/IMaclaren

As Joseph Addison said, “Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.” But in my 7 year-old son’s case he seems to be in a never-ending cycle of sadness, rage and resentment. I’m the mother of two boys with very different temperaments from one another.  My 12 year-old is Buddha-like calm and collected and my 7 year-old is tornado-like brilliant artist diagnosed with ADHD/Auditory Processing Disorder. I love them dearly and they are both the heart and soul of my being.

 When my second child was born in 2006 I launched The Go-To Mom web series. It wasn’t until my son turned three years old that my life spun completely out of control. Back then my toddler sucked me in the warp of his fidgeting, emotionally angry world and the only way for me to deal with him was to take a year off from work to sort out my mental health needs as well as his. Each day I felt like I was riding a wild horse with out any reins and direction. I thought I knew how to run a healthy household and successful business by having super strong boundaries and by putting my foot down to be sure every one gets what they rightfully deserve. But that’s not always easy.  For me, I am whole-heartedly connected to my kids. I am not my work. For many years I thought I was both, that I could balance both of these entities seamlessly. I felt like I was slowly chipped away by work and by dealing with my son and his challenging ADHD diagnosis. It has been a tireless progression of constant intervention. I thought I am his mother, and knew I had to turn work down to deal with him.

 As the years went on, my son got worse. We found that his sensory processing disorder/ADHD/impulsivity was a neurological issue; therapy and more strict discipline didn’t cut it. We had to restructure our lives and the way we interacted with him. And yes, that meant not working for long periods of time.  My son’s inability to control his impulses was a huge turn off to most kids, so making and keeping friends was a challenge for him. He is a highly social creature, happy, loving and so willing to learn. But his lack of social etiquette and short temper left him often alone. So that meant we had to provide most of the social interaction and daily activity for him until he learned to master things on his own. It was heartbreaking and eventually threw me into the tide of my own childhood issues of feeling completely helpless.  I can walk away from a bad business deal or an insincere hurtful statement from someone, but I can’t be indifferent to the fact my boy couldn’t keep friends. I adore my friends  – that’s what makes life so colorful and interesting. Friends are the cushion of life. It sadden us that our son couldn’t experience a genuine friendship yet.

 Being conscious of our kid’s life experiences is a good thing. It allows us to advocate for them.  Letting things happen, or waiting for a sign of abnormal development could be detrimental. Early intervention is key if you see something is not right with your child. If you catch the problem early than the prognosis is better.

When my child is rejected, I’m rejected. It hurts me like it hurts him.  The toughest part of this process is over-identifying with my kids. Just when I think I’m living in full awareness, my son does something that triggers an old emotional response for me. I try to breathe and let it pass. My OCD can easily throw me into a tizzy at the most innocent drop of a cup full of juice. I take a breath; hold back the old dramatic response of wanting to scream and kneel down to rigorously mop up the mess. Instead I remember I am a mother who is suppose to be role model… And I don’t want to to waste my energy on spilled juice, which is an insignificant moment that means nothing.  And for me my son is everything.

I would think how could a human being only 3 feet tall have this much power over me? It seemed an impossible task to figure out a way to have a good relationship with him. He clearly needed me to be patient and understanding. I remember one night crying on the bathroom floor with him – he kept hitting me. I wanted to hit him back… Everything we find dysfunctional with our immediate family or things that deeply set us off is really our issue. Until we resolve our personal vendetta within our selves our children and loved ones will continually suffer. I needed to completely change my perception of my life to deal with my situation, which made dealing with my son possible. All human beings on a subconscious level know we are responsible for the quality of our own life experiences, even children we know this. That is why children internalize pain. Kids truly feel bad things happen possibly because of something they did. My job is to be sure my son learns to be confident and knows that he is loved no matter what. I have to remind myself that my son needs intervention and help, not a fed-up mother… I have to consciously attend to my emotional growth and mental health because it helps me deal with my son and family more humanely.

Dealing with a special needs situation sometimes requires a combination of thorough Neuropsych assessments, therapy for child, family therapy, good books on high energy kids and ADHD, school accommodations, family restructuring, diet alteration, medication, body work, deep breathing exercises, visual imagery and reaching out to other families to see what’s worked for them. Most of all working on your own mental health as a parent is of utmost importance…because neglecting the role as a parent will only make things worse.

“We don not have to qualify to be loved. Love is our birthright. Love just is. Love is who and what we are.” Michael Brown

For more information on ADHD visit:  http://www.ncld.org

What is and isn’t a learning disability (LD)? LD is more than a “difference” or “difficulty” with learning—it’s a neurological disorder that affects the brain’s ability to receive, process, store and respond to information. LD will vary in how it impacts each individual child, adolescent and adult. Understanding the basic facts will enable you to help yourself, your child, or someone you know to be a well-informed and effective advocate.

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My Appearance on the Today Show – My 3rd point is below (which was not conveyed in segment)

I was on the Today Show (with the awesome Emily McKhann) and unfortunately my 3rd point was not made due to time constraints so I wanted to post it to complete my take on this site and the motivation behind it.

No mom intentionally posts “rage inducing” comments on her FB page, which is part of the subtitle of Blair’s new book. Her platform is not just for humor, the very name of her site is mean spirited and judgmental –let’s call a spade a spade, she takes mom’s posts with out permission, which are completely hijacked out of context from FB community, and will be publishing them for profit. Being a mom is a unique and mind boggling experience, and supporting each other can be done in many ways other than mockery.

“When we judge or criticize another person, it says nothing about that person; it merely says something about our own need to be critical.”
– Unknown

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