WOMEN AND TRANSITION — Unchartered Territory or Power Boost?

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By Linda Rossetti – Guest Writer —

Have you ever experienced a job loss, an empty nest, menopause, childbirth, marriage, divorce, infertility, retirement, a career change, a geographic move, a change in health status, or another similarly weighty life event? Each one can begin a transition, a unique opportunity to realign your life, nourish the person you are, and live the life you imagine. I’ll never forget how I felt. Awful is a valid summary.  I hit the pause button on a twenty-year career to the surprise of nearly everyone around me.

For decades I’d dedicated myself to building a working persona.  When I say dedicated I mean full on.  Six days a week.  24×7.   Harvard MBA. CEO of a venture capital backed tech start-up. C-suite insider at a Fortune 500 company.

Right around my 40th birthday I added two children to the mix within sixteen months of each other.

Something happened when my two children were entering elementary school.  The goal or work image that had captivated so much of my attention for decades was ringing hollow.   This realization occurred in parallel to the exploding demands of my personal life.  On top of children I added elder care issues. The intersection of all of this left me wondering: there must be something more for me. But what?

I often describe that moment as Scrooge-esque. I was visited by all manner of feelings.  I was angry at myself because I hit the pause button on a twenty-year high-achieving career.  I convinced myself that I had failed.  I was ashamed that I didn’t know the answer to what was next for me.  I was felt guilty, exhausted and alone.

Uncertainty was everywhere.  One long time friend’s comment sticks with me.  Upon learning that I’d temporarily stepped away from my crazy work existence she said, “You – of all people.”

I felt admonished, judged, marginalized, or worse – pushed to pretend as if nothing was happening.  On top of all that I felt as if I was failing at my most important role, as a parent.  Thankfully – amidst all this uncertainty and self-doubt – I had the presence of mind to reach out to other women in search of an answer. What I learned astonished me. Transition was all around us. It is one of those topics that is hiding in plain sight.

The notion of transition and its role in women’s lives captivated my soul. I began a process of discovery that led me to talk with more than 200 women about their transition experiences. I learned that transition is widely misunderstood and that the skill sets to navigate it are underdeveloped. I also observed that very often without an understanding of transition women misinterpret its earliest signs as failure.

My learnings from the research inspired me to write Women & Transition: Reinventing Work and Life and to establish a not-for-profit dedicated to increasing the capacity for transition in women everywhere.  Today I face uncertainty just as much as I did five years ago. But I handle it differently. My knowledge of transition gives me sightlines into uncertainty.   With this knowledge I know what to expect even though I don’t know the answer.  It neutralizes fear.  I have confidence even as I walk forward into the unknown.

Transition has given me so much beyond this deep knowledge.  It’s given me connections to hundreds of women who understand this shift.  Their collective voices helped me refine my own voice.  For that I’m ever grateful.  It’s also given me a vocabulary and toolkit to share.  It allows me to speak and be heard even when I am in an uncertain place.

Transition has given me peace and gratitude and resilience and energy and a belief in unbounded possibility. Is it time for you to embark on this same understanding?

ABOUT LINDA:

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Linda Rossetti focuses on research, writing, and advocacy on subjects related to women’s development. She also serves as managing director f or Golden Seeds, LLC, an angel capital network that works with emerging women-led businesses. Linda is a sought-after speaker on a wide range of issues affecting women and business. She is an active contributor to several boards and is known for her interest in topics related to executive performance and the alignment between strategy and compensation. Prior to her current commitments, she served as Executive Vice President of Human Resources and Administration for Iron Mountain, a Fortune 500 company, and as CEO of a venture capital-backed technology start-up, which was successfully sold to Perot Systems. She holds an MBA from the Harvard Business School and a BA from Simmons College.